Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Dateline Chennai, 12/24/13: A quick recap of the Anand-Carlsen match

The recently concluded World Championship of Chess was a tense affair, pitting the world's number one ranked player, Magnus Carlsen at just 22 years of age, against the wily 44 year old Indian veteran, Vishwanathan Anand.  Drama erupted early and often throughout the contest; here are the top ten most memorable moments.

10: Anand forced to strip naked during weigh-in

9: Carlsen injures left anterior cruciate ligament during pre-game rook lift

8: Kasparov banned from front row of spectators after tossing chair at Anand during tag team portion of game two

7: Carlsen nearly deported for counterfeiting visas for his wacky and lovable domestic servants Mathias and Oliver

6. Kasparov evicted from playing hall for wearing a mexican wrestling mask and macing the press corps

5. Anand eaten by tiger at closing ceremony

4. Game nine: Carlsen tenaciously defends the Black side of the aggressive Saemisch Variation of the Nimzo-Indian Defense and wins on move 28 when Anand, under the pressure of a must-win situation late in the match, molests a horse

3. Kasparov arrested on charges of public intoxicaton and attempted theft and operation of an unlicensed lawnmower

2. Magnus Carlsen celebrates victory with traditional Norwegian festival of mutual respect and awareness for other people's personal space and social boundaries

1. IOC reinstates Curling for the 2016 Summer Games

2 comments:

  1. 0: Play must be halted for two days because of Anand both legs in an unexpected attempt at Skijumping. He tried to be more Norwegian in order to get into Carlsens mind. Genius plan, poor execution.

    -1 A raging mob of love-crazed groupies can just be stopped from storming the playing area. Carlsen in consequence takes to disguising as a russian circus clown when leaving his hotel room.

    -2 It is revealed that Carlsen is indeed a Cyborg programmed by a shady company called Asgard. The indians answer by launching an immediate moon rocket to get to the root of the problem. Delhi - we have a problem.

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